Martial Arts for Life

On A Quest To Be The Best!

Show Up For Yourself


“Eighty percent of success is showing up.” – Woody Allen

Do you have anyone in your life who you can count on…to come up with excuses? You know the type of person I’m talking about. These folks seem to have absolutely the worst luck in the world. When it’s time for them to show up for you they have a flat tire, a sprained ankle, or a sewer pipe that broke and flooded their basement. If you made plans a month ago to get together, some minor calamity will befall them hours before you’re supposed to get together. These folks always seem to contract a mystery illness, have automotive problems, or random commitments that pop up at the last minute. I’m going to guess that we all have had experience with these types of people and eventually we come to the inevitable conclusion that we cannot depend on them to show up for us.

It is certainly disappointing and frustrating to find out that you can’t depend on a friend to come through for you, even if it’s just engaging in purely social things. However, it’s even more unfortunate when we fail to come through for ourselves.

Much like our flaky friends, we can become experts at making up lame excuses to avoid taking action. We tend to do this by justifying our reasons with logic, when deep down we know we are letting ourselves down. Naturally, this can occur in any area of life and I find it is a major challenge when it comes to health, fitness, and proper diet.

Human beings can justify almost anything within our own minds. Whether it’s purchasing some gadget or toy we don’t really need (and won’t use more than once) or parking next to a fire hydrant because, “it’s just going to be for a minute.” These are small things with minor consequences, but the habit of justifying laziness and apathy is invariably fatal to success.

For example, let’s imagine that as part of my New Year’s Resolution to get in shape, I committed to go the gym and exercise three times per week. And today, when my alarm clock went off at 6:00 a.m. I went through a series of reasons why it was definitely not a good idea to go to the gym today.

Perhaps my inner dialogue could go something like this:

“I did not sleep well at all last night and it would be pointless to even try to work out. I’m just not going to be into it at all. I’ll just go tomorrow instead.”

“Plus, I’m still a little bit sore from my last workout and I don’t want to overdo it. After all, if I hurt myself I won’t be able to train at all.”

“And, I think I’m starting to feel a little bit of a cold coming on, and working out will only make it worse.”

“Oh, and last time I went to the gym on a Wednesday it was way too crowded! I don’t want to have to wait to use any of the equipment. I’ll be there all day.”

The challenge is the potential truth in all these statements and that’s why it becomes easy to justify laying in bed. However, deep down I know none of those reasons is serious enough to keep me from training if I really wanted to keep my commitment to myself. The reality of the situation is I want to lay in bed because it is a lot easier to stay in a warm, comfortable bed than it is to drag myself to the gym in freezing weather so I can punish myself with cardio and weights for 90 minutes. However, admitting that I just want to sleep in makes me a lazy bum, while skipping because I am sleep deprived, sick and sore does not.

Way too often that’s how it is with the reasons we give ourselves. We have the reasons that “sound good” that we tell ourselves and then we have the real reasons that we dare not admit. And the problem is it becomes easier with each time we make excuses and don’t show up for ourselves. It becomes a habit. Pretty soon any old excuse will do and our health, fitness, and goals in all areas of our lives suffer because of it.

“The truth is, there are only two things in life, reasons and results, and reasons simply don’t count.” – Dr. Robert Anthony

I believe successful people have an uncanny ability to be honest with themselves. I encourage you to make a real effort to be honest with yourself next time you plan on ditching your workout, straying from your healthy diet, or failing to show up for yourself. Ultimately, no one is going to force you to take care of yourself, no one is going to pursue your goals for you, and no one can make you show up for yourself. It’s up to you.

Martial Arts in Union County, NJ

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Karate Union County NJ – Martial Arts for Life

February 27, 2013 Posted by | Health & Nutrition | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Family Safety: Home Invasion Prevention | New Providence NJ | Summit NJ | Berkeley Heights NJ


Family Safety: Home Invasion Prevention

One of the most frightening crimes that can occur is a home invasion. A home invasion is defined as “the act of illegally entering a private and occupied dwelling with violent intent for the purpose of committing a crime against the occupants.” The main difference between a simple burglary and a home invasion is intent. Residential burglars typically target homes that appear unoccupied and seek to perpetrate their crime in the absence of the homeowner. Conversely, the home invasion robber targets homes when they are most likely to be occupied (nights and weekends for example).

How do home invasion robbers pick their victims, and how do they get into your home? According to security consultant Chris McGoey, “Some home invaders might have been in your home before as a delivery person, installer or repair vendor. Home robbers rarely work alone and rely on an overwhelming physical confrontation to gain initial control and instill fear in you. The greatest violence usually occurs during the initial sixty seconds of the confrontation…”

While it is true that some home invaders violently enter the residence by kicking in the door, many home invasions begin by the homeowner simply answering their front door when someone knocks. Some common phrases used to get you to open your door are:

“I have a delivery I need you to sign for.”

“I’m sorry. I think I just backed into your car outside.”

“I think I just hit a dog and I’m looking for the owner.”

Home invaders have also been known to pose as maintenance or public utility workers, delivery men, or even police officers.

Once an intruder gains access to the home, various demands are typically made to gain possession of jewelry, cash, and other valuables. Some invaders will tie their victims up while they ransack the home. Others will force one or more of the victims to leave with them, driving them to an ATM machine to withdraw cash.

Although few statistics are available on the crime of home invasion, because it is not defined as a crime in its own right in most jurisdictions, recent statistics have indicated you are eight times more likely to be involved in a home inva­sion attack than you are to be involved in a house fire. Below are ten tips to help you and your loved ones avoid the horror of a home invasion.

Top 10 Home Invasion Prevention Tips

1.) Secure your home with strong doors and locks. Research indicates the most common point of entry is the front door. Properly securing your front entrance will make it more difficult for an intruder to simply kick the door in. At the very least, a secure front door will slow down an intruder and buy you some time to contact the authorities or escape. Proper security includes solid core doors, heavy duty locks, and window security devices. Chain latches are considered ineffective as a barrier.

2.) Never open your door to strangers or solicitors. A majority of home invasions start with a simple knock on the door. Demand identification from anyone who you do not know. This includes utility workers, delivery persons, repairmen and even police officers who are in plain clothes. Verify the identification by calling that place of business (or the person’s employer). If someone claims to be in distress or needs assistance or directions, tell them you are calling the police to respond.

3.) Develop an escape plan for your family and rehearse it. Train family members on where to go and what to say. If someone can escape, the invaders will have lost their advantage of privacy and time. Children are often overlooked as potential rescuers and sometimes are not as well guarded. If the opportunity presents itself, a trained child can dial 911, activate an alarm panic button, or escape to the neighbor’s house to summon the police. Remember, the best defense against home invasion is education and planning.

4.)  Maintain good relations with your neighbors, and keep an eye on each other. Get involved with your community. If you see something suspicious at a neighbor’s house, contact them or the police immediately.

5.) Lock all doors, windows, and garages at all times. Fortification of rear doors, sliding glass doors, and garage doors are also important.

6.) If you have a home security system, set the home perimeter alarm at night. If someone attempts to gain entry, the alarm will sound, giving you time to respond.

7.) Keep porches and all entrances well lit, i.e., driveways, garages and alleys.  Check bulbs regularly.

8.) Senior citizens or women living alone might consider leaving items such as a pair of men’s boots or other garments laying about, giving the impression that other persons reside there.

9.) Consider owning a dog for protection. If this isn’t possible, an empty dog bowl left on the porch gives the impression that there is a dog on the premises.

10.) Don’t fight over property with an invader. Let them have the property; it is not worth your life and can be replaced. Never follow the intruder from scene, call 911 immediately and give the best description you can.

As Benjamin Franklin said, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”  Educating yourself, preparing your dwelling and forming a well thought-out plan with your family is the first (and perhaps most effective) line of defense against a home invasion.

*Statistics and tips compiled from various sources including: J. Frankle (GSE, Inc.), Torrington Police Department, Pennsylvania State Police, C. McGoey.

January 16, 2013 Posted by | Personal Safety | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment